Saturday, July 7, 2012

Can't Get Up

When I got home last night I ended up retreating to the tub.  The water wasn't hot enough.  My dh telling me it is still 104 degrees and 7pm and WTH was I in a hot bath for.  He was right.

I called my grandparents.   My grandpa remarried before I was born.  And my grandma is sooo incredible awesome.  At 70 she water skis,  hikes, horse back rides, and you would never know she is 70.  I miss her so much.  I am especially glad I got her.   We talked for a long time.  She listened mostly.  Shared her experience that was similiar to mine with her birth mother.

She reminded me over and over that my Father in Heaven is all knowing and his love will not waiver even when I do.

She showed compassion for my birth father.   Telling me she has never truly hated anyone.  He was one she did.  For what he did to my mother and I.  She shared what she knew.   I let her in a little bit about what happened when he.moved back to the Midwest and what his intentions were. 

I laid in bed and chatted on my computer most of the night.   This morning I can't get up.  My body is not moving.  At all.    I want to do things and had intentions of spending time with my family.  I have a Dr appt in an hour.  I have no choice...I have to.get up.!

This pic of my pug and his monkey...remind me of how I feel today!

1 comment:

Jgirl said...

I love your pug with his monkey! My mom went through something very similar to what you're experiencing--when her father died. All I can say is just keep swimming...