What a conversation I (husband and friend mostly) had while I was at the salon today.
My husband and friend met me there. She asked him what he been up to. He told her he had a therapy appt. She laughed and said me, too. Then my dh and friend discussed the fact they saw the same person. My gal doing my hair pipes in and said " oh I know her....mine 2 before I switched insurances". Then the other stylist pipes in. For nearly 30 minutes the 4 of them discussed this topic.
I love the gal who does my hair. First thing she said to me today was "your hair is different....wht new meds are you on?" I say none...none at all. Very low dose of lamictal. We discuss how higher dose makes my hair fall out. She wonders if even the low dose is an issue since it is much finer than before. UGH. It is what it is and it is crucial I remain on a low dose...I so can't go back to that place. It is the closest I have become to throwing in the towel in several years.
Days like today, feel somewhat scarier than the really dark days. Getting a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes causes more anxiety as I fear going backwards again.
I'm writing this on my phone and my battery is going to die. So enuf of the purging thoughts for tonight.