~Swirling~

I had/have a blog post swirling about this very quote.  I had started the post yesterday morning while I was sitting at work on-call.  When I found out about my Uncle Dan, I was unable to compose it.  I sat down this morning in hopes that I could finish it.  Instead, I deleted the post. 

Our childhood can kill the dreams we often have.  I know there are a few different things that happened my senior year of high school that significantly killed the dream that I ever had of "going to college and getting a college degree."  This particular tape is one that has (and still does) play rather loud and often gets stuck on repeat.

I'm not going to be composing that post. It was deleted this morning.  I am still trying to process my Uncle D's death and the impact that it will forever hold on his beautiful family.  His children, who are my age.  Whom, when we were younger we were very very close!!  Trying to process the fact that I live half a nation away and feel even further away.  There is nothing more than I would love to do right now than to board a plane and fly 1/2 way across the US...just so I could sit in the presense of my beautiful Aunt and her children.  To hug them, cry with them, just to bask in their sweet spirits. 

I'm sure my Uncle D had many different things that killed his dreams.  His life was successful.  Very.  Until an accident that took away his ability to work in his business.

I will forever remember his infectious smile, his calm personality, his pure hatred for my birth father that was SOOOO validiating to me (i hate him, too), his love for his Father in Heaven and even more...his love for his wife and children.