Sometimes, that consists of only a few days.
Sometimes, that can consist of longer periods of time.
Sometimes, I don't even know what it is that I'm thinking/wanting/needing from that particular break.
I'm not positive I believe this quote. However, I will try to embrace it. Try and find meaning behind it.
I had a therapy appt this morning that left my head spinning a tad more than usual. I get that J was thinking out loud and attempting to figure out which direction we need to move fwd in. However, it left me feeling very unsettled! I know it wasn't her intent. I know that therapy isn't supposed to be roses and rainbows. I know it is her job to put these things out there. In no way did it offend me. Yet, at the same time she hit a very very raw spot. One that I'm not even able to put words to. I wish I could. Maybe if I could, she could feel like she was helping me....or better yet..I..could help myself. What I can say is..until I know what I need....I'm not sure J or anyone else can help me. Today more than ever am feeling very beaten down (again nothing J said...just my own thought process and such) and completely a failure. Because seriously....who the hell is in therarpy long term as in several years w/o knowing what they want/need?
So for now and the hours/days ahead I will ponder....why I was given this life? and how it will leave me strong enough to live it.
I may/may not - post a Thankfulness Monday Project. I've got a few drafts that I've not published bc I've felt particularly vulnerable lately and have left them out in cyber-draft-land.
1 comment:
Do only what you are comfortable with. Cut yourself some slack. I do not know why you were put on this earth, but I am so thankful you are here.
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