Meds? Who Knows.

I started new antidepressant abt a month ago.  This morning as I took it....light bulb went off.  There are several triggers and situational things right now playing roll into how I'm feeling.  But the intensity is pretty different.  Few weeks of OK....not to horrific.  And then BAM here I am.  It isn't pretty.  Never is.  However the last 24 hrs have been pretty frippen horrific.  The intensity, frequency, and impulsive self harm shit is overwhelming.  I don't blog that part for any other reason than for my own good.  Not believing it is something I have hell of a lot of control over.