As I slowly climb my way out of the dark hole that I've been, in the world continues to move on. Deep depression and suicidal ideation has slowly faded. It's there. I am not convinced it will ever go away. There are days when I wonder what it would be like to not always be wondering when the next bout will come creeping/crashing back in.
I walked around a mini-mall that is in an upscale neighborhood. I never go there. I enjoyed looking at each of the large gingerbread houses. And then I walked outside into a flurry of large white fluffy stuff. The first we've really had at this point.
I had an appt for a massage at noon. I've blogged before about "The Healing effects of Massage Mind". For the first time in months....this article explains exactly where I spent 90 minutes of my day. The worry about when the lights would flicker on/off.
All of it....gone.
The non-stop chatter.
The endless worry.
GONE. Not for part of my massage. Not for half of it. For 99% of the 90 minutes that I laid on that table....it was all gone.
H* described it so well when I stepped into her office after collecting my thoughts. "You needed that system reset."
And that is the same thought as I sat in the rocker putting my socks on. I needed this reset. There was no deep tissue work. There was no deep myfacia release. There was no pain (well...not really I have a few trigger points on my hip/sciatic that are painful). I
We all need a System Reset from time to time. It was what I needed today.