The 'DAY' Came and Went

Surgery day came and went.
It wasn't cancelled.
Even though it was really close to being cancelled.

I'm slowly recovering.  Contrary to what the Dr. Quack Surgeon, I first saw back in April/May said...there was quite a bit of damage.  Contrary to what the 2 MRI's I had done revealed...there was quite a bit of damage.

Shortly before going into surgery, my husband and I spoke w/my surgeon.  Asking him about recovery, driving my car, possible return to light-duty and regular duty work...ect ect.  At that point he told us he believed there was a less than 5% chance of me needing my rotator cuff repaired.

He spoke in length with my husband after my surgery.   The surgery was nearly 90 minutes longer than anticipated because of the additional damage needing repaired.

I've had a range of emotions about what the surgeon told my husband and the amount of damage.  I spoke to my surgeon briefly and when he told me what he found I was upset.  It is validating to some lengths.  And it is extremely upsetting all in one.

As expected I'm struggling with pain medication and being able to stay on top pain.  My husband was able to touch base w/H* my massage therapist and get an essential oil that she's used for migraines/nausea.  It worked wonders yesterday as I struggled with getting 'up and down' and any movement.

Originally my surgeon told me we would consider discussing a return to driving/work date of around 10-12 weeks post op.  He told my husband when he spoke to him that I will not be driving for at least 4-6 months. And most likely closer to 6 months. SIX MORE MONTHS before I can return to work.  OUCH.

Even larger OUCH when I think about what the original quack ass doctor told me.  The surgeon told my husband, if I continued to work w/what was going on, it was a matter of time before I did more severe damage and would have needed a complete shoulder repair.  OUCH OUCH OUCH.

And tonight....I'm feeling that "emotional OUCH". On a good day...I'm emotional. Meds tend to increase agitation, depression....and I'm just hoping that the emotional part of this can stay 'at bay'....far far away.